their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
