Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize
