I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize