I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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