But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Man, jail baloney is awful.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
