Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
