what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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