It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize