What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Randomize
