Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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