He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
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