you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize