Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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