It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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