I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
