butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I skipped work to stalk him.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
