I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
