Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize
