i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.