So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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