But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
