He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Randomize
