Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
