Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
