I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
wanna go halves on a baby?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
