I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize