Dual....:-)
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
