My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
