chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
