just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize