school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
