elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be your penis for a week.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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