Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
The feeling are messing with the penis
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
