...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
