Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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