am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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