I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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