Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
