Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
