Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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