I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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