Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
