ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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