I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
