Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
