There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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