did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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