? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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