Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
