This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
we're making bets on your personal life
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
